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At Least I'm Not That Lady
Jun. 11th, 2012 10:26 amAnyone who's a frequent user of public transportation, particularly on specific bus routes, has a good chance of running into the same people over and over again. Examples for me would include Lady From The Old Country With Walker, Tiny Little Gay Man and Cuts In Front Pays With Pennies Guy. Ditto for drivers. Monday is usually Last Minute Larry, who tears around the corner and doesn't even bother pulling the bus to the curb, just waves people on from the middle of the street. Today, though, it was Don't Come On Yet I'm Not Ready Because I Like Being Late Frank.
Befuddled Woman With Briefcase is one who almost always has to run to catch the bus, and when by some miracle she's there on time, still doesn't have her pass card ready. It's as if she doesn't anticipate needing it, and has stashed it so deep within her bag she has to stand there for a long time searching for it. This morning was a standard mad dash, until another woman came from behind - a mother, lover or housekeeper - bearing a travel mug of coffee. Befuddled Woman turned, grabbed the coffee and spun back around.
This was when she spectacularly wiped out. So much so, her shoes were left behind. Coffee spilled everywhere. Mother, Lover or Housekeeper flailed her arms. Befuddled Woman gamely got back up, exchanged some words with Mother, Lover or Housekeeper and climbed on the bus. One stop later, she got off. Her trousers had giant holes in the knees. I'm fairly sure her palms were scraped.
I have to confess here that it was very difficult to stifle laughter throughout the whole affair. I know that makes me a terrible person, but it was amazing. Even now, picturing the glorious arc of coffee makes a giggle worm its way out of me.
tl;dr
While my head still hurts, at least I am not that lady.
Befuddled Woman With Briefcase is one who almost always has to run to catch the bus, and when by some miracle she's there on time, still doesn't have her pass card ready. It's as if she doesn't anticipate needing it, and has stashed it so deep within her bag she has to stand there for a long time searching for it. This morning was a standard mad dash, until another woman came from behind - a mother, lover or housekeeper - bearing a travel mug of coffee. Befuddled Woman turned, grabbed the coffee and spun back around.
This was when she spectacularly wiped out. So much so, her shoes were left behind. Coffee spilled everywhere. Mother, Lover or Housekeeper flailed her arms. Befuddled Woman gamely got back up, exchanged some words with Mother, Lover or Housekeeper and climbed on the bus. One stop later, she got off. Her trousers had giant holes in the knees. I'm fairly sure her palms were scraped.
I have to confess here that it was very difficult to stifle laughter throughout the whole affair. I know that makes me a terrible person, but it was amazing. Even now, picturing the glorious arc of coffee makes a giggle worm its way out of me.
tl;dr
While my head still hurts, at least I am not that lady.
