These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty

Surely, there must be a scientific rationale behind the tendency of cats to decide that the fastest, most economical route anywhere - even if it's well out of their way - is directly across their owner. I'm sitting here minding my own business when the cats, in the height of play-chase time, dash my way. Roy banks off my chest like that's my whole purpose, to be his cool fight-style setup, and tears off. Johnny perches on my shoulder and waits to see where Roy's going next, then bounds away. Both leave good-sized scratches in their wake.

Later, Johnny is at one end of the sofa, eying the back of it. She decides to hop up there, so she trots down to my end and crawls all over me to get to her final destination.

Here's an oldie-but-goodie:

Heard rustling from upstairs, like someone was playing with tissue paper. Hmm, I thought, I wonder what Roy has gotten into. (It's always Roy.) The rustling kept up for a good five minutes, and then ... then Roy came flying down the stairs, ears back, panic on his face and head caught in the handle of a large plastic bag. The bag billowed behind him like a cape, or maybe a parachute. No, a cape, as it did not slow him down. He tore around downstairs in a zig-zaggy loop and ran back up again.

Silence.

I found him huggled in a corner, having a moderate to severe feline panic attack.

Maybe you had to be there, but folks, it was so hilarious I couldn't stop laughing for ten minutes. I could almost hear his cat brain chanting, "Gotta escape, get it off, gotta escape" as he ran around with that bag attached to him.

Now that is how to start a day.

I honestly don't understand folks who can use the words you are and then, in the same sentence, also mean to use it in its contraction form but instead type your.

"You are such a goofy thing, it's like your high on life."

Seriously. I don't get how it's so tough to know that the amalgamation of you and are is you're and not your. It's not confusing. Worse, though, are the people that use you're correctly and then incorrectly. It's like grammar whiplash to me.


I other news, internet woes continue. Is it unreasonable to be irritated that it's been nearly two weeks and no resolution is in sight? I resent having to ask to go online, tbh, primarily because it feels invasive that they then know when I'm online and when I'm not. It's ... uncomfortable or something.

Last night, just as I was about to take a nice drink of ice cold water, Johnny decided the only route to the back of the sofa was across my lap. Unanticipated ice water bath, thanks, little fucking cat! It really was the first time I uttered uncharitable words at the poor sweetie sweet, because she's seriously the most polite cat in the world. I think I also said, nonsensically, "I hope your apple pie is freaking worth it!"

( This is what she got up to on the back of the sofa: )

Annnnd this morning I awoke, stumbled half asleep to the bathroom. And instantly stepped in a little poop ball. Someone wasn't done when s/he left the box. At least I had shoes on, though the drawback is the pair I was wearing happened to have very intricate and plentiful grooves on the soles. Gross. GROSSSS.

I really am going to perish of fits one of these days.

But, oh! I made popcorn today and dusted it with a blend of dill, celery seed, onion powder and salt and YUM.

1) Bathroom creeper.
2) Likes to wake me up by licking my mouth (which is really gross).
3) Has a dangerous obsession with my left breast (which has become kind of a big deal).
4) Often angles for love while I am standing naked in the bathroom getting ready for work.

The latest:

I had a presoak of my delicates going on in the bathroom sink. As I fixed my English muffin in the kitchen I heard a subtle scraping sound. Turned around and found Roy had yoinked a pair of my underwear (the pink, cute ones) from the soak and was dragging it through the apartment. "Roy, you pervert," I said as I retrieved the garment and put it back. Then, as I was eating aforementioned English muffin, I heard a loud SLAP from the bathroom, something I missed due to the sound of the toaster timer click-clicking away the first time. Then, moments later, a slide-scrape-slide.

He got the black ones that time.

I decided the presoak was over. ;)

Here's my official "oh, yeesh, I should not have signed up for summergen" post. Because YEESH. This will be my last one. It always makes me incredibly sad when I move on from writing for a show I adored at one point but for which can no longer feel the same level of love. I knew it was happening. :/

I bought a Zoom Groom for the cats and they LOVE it. John used to dash away under the bed when I'd bring out the grooming tools, but now she rushes for me very puffytail excited. It's adorbs. I'll stick with frequent brushing now, which will hopefully reduce some of the shedding.

It's gorgeous out today. Roy enjoys the window. Roy is a window hog.



( Witness his glee )

This post is dedicated to kaleecat. Who loves ya, baby? ;)

I haven't baked in a while, which is a shame. I found the idea of gluten-free cookies intriguing, so I pottered around a bit and found a recipe. Actually, flourless might be a safer term than gluten-free, because sometimes things can contain trace elements of stuff.

I also used organic dark chocolate, so those with so sensitivities should be okay to eat them.

( Cookies thisaway )

I made them about four times bigger than I was supposed to. What can I say? If you're gonna eat a cookie, eat a cookie.

( Sunny day, cats. )

My gen big bang is posting next Tuesday, so apologies to all who don't read SPN or SPN gen. I'm so far behind reading - though some are no fly zones for me, so I won't read them all. Maybe someday I'll get over my 3rd/present phobia. ;)



Roy's got a new freckle! He's got one on the crease of his nose, but you can't see that one well in this shot. Scratch that, it's no freckle. He just had a dirty nose. The other one, the one you can't see - that's a freckle. ;)

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