superbadgirl | Jan. 20th, 2005

Why does it seem that only the nutjobs find me attractive?

Guy from hotel: Hi, yeah. I was wondering if maybe, you know, sometime we could hang out.
Me, forewarned (from his case worker) with info the GFH is seriously disturbed: No.
GFH: Aw, man, that's too bad.
Me: Sorry.
GFH: Are you sure, because I sense there's something going on between us.
Me: I'm positive. I'm flattered, but no.
GFH: I just thought that since I told you you're having a really good hair day...

(What? I know owe you a date??)

Me: And I appreciate that, but I'm still saying no.
GFH: I don't mean to be inappropriate, it's just that you're very good looking. There's nothing I can do to change your mind?
Me: Absofuckinglutely not.
GFH: I can run! I can fly! I'll do anything.
Me: No. 1) I don't date people who live here and 2) NOOOOOOOOOO!
GFH: You're very good looking. You're very good looking.
Me: Thank you for saying that, but it doesn't make me change my mind.
GFH: You know I'm in room #530, right?
Me: Yes, I know where you live. (And I also know how to call the police.) Please go away now.
GFH: So if you change your mind, you'll call me, right?
Me: I will not be changing my mind.
GFH: Aw, are you sure? You're just so good looking. I get distracted when I walk by the desk and I just have to stop.
Me: Quite positive. Even if I were interested in the slightest, which I am NOT, I don't date people who live here.
GFH: Oh. But we could go somewhere else and hang out.
Me: Doesn't matter. You still live here. I still work here. I'm not going out with you.
GFH: I'm so disappointed.
Me: Sorry.
GFH: But you know where I live, right? #530. Let me know if you change your mind.
Me: I won't.
GFH: Whatever man gets you is so lucky!
Me: Go away now.

NOT kidding here, folks. In fact, I think I made it less annoying (and leaning toward downright frightening) than it was.