Random stuff

[superbadgirl]

Sometimes I wonder why exactly I had (and still have to some degree) a strong dislike of getting my photograph taken when I was a little girl. Starting at about 18 months, professional pictures were traumatic for me, as evidenced by tear-stained cheeks, watery eyes and red little nose in every picture. If we even walked into JC Penney, I would begin to sob hysterically because I thought my mother was making me do the picture thing again.

When I was four, I was in my uncle's wedding as one of the flower girls. I was fine with my responsibilities until picture time. I was even fine with picture time until the photographer attempted to move me; at the first touch to my knee, I wailed and cried and would not be soothed. I remember doing it and I remember feeling very upset, but, logically, I cannot figure out why I reacted so strongly.

I dunno, but this thing eventually turned into slight neurosis about getting my picture taken. I don't cry anymore, but I still will back out of a photo any chance I get. If I see someone with a camera, I run the other way. People generally assume this reaction is because I think I'm unattractive, which isn't the case at all. I could be supermodel gorgeous and I'd still avoid cameras.

But I wonder - was it really the picture-taking that made me so unhappy?

Comments

[aizjanika.livejournal.com]

I couldn't even begin to guess. When I was little, my issue was that I wanted to have my picture taken by myself and not with my sister. My parents and everyone else always assumed that we were joined at the hip. *g* So I'd try to get out of the photo in my own little way and hope that someone loved me enough to take a photo of me on my own. (It never happened. *g*) Nowadays, I really do think I look unattractive in phots. *g*

Maybe the photo sessions are associated with something that scared you or made you sad, but you don't remember it now.